The wild Bunter

exactlyhalf and I wrote this little ditty. We felt that Mr M Bunter, that modest many of many talents needed a backstory. Preferably one he could sing, so here 'tis.

I've been a wild Bunter for many's the year
But I've changed all my ways now that Lord Peter's here.
He needs a good man since that hell that was War
So I never shall play the wild Bunter no more.

And it's no, nay, never
No nay never no more
Shall I play the wild Bunter
No never, no more

A serving man's life is more hard than you'd think
I can not deny that it drove me to drink
I fear I'm a drunkard or one of that ilk
For I slipped brandy into me warm bedtime milk

But it's no, nay, never...

While polishing silver one day, by and by
A fair lady's maid caught my wandering eye
We shared tender glances, some smiles and what's more -
I kissed that young maid behind the kitchen door

But it's no, nay, never...

While sitting one night with another man's man
He pulled out some cards, and then it began
A few pennies here, some shillings, a crown
My master would no more leave sovereigns around

But it's no, nay, never...

A shooting weekend at a country estate
The men they got drinking, they stayed up quite late
But dawn found me creeping back into the house
And inside my coat were three braces of grouse

I worked for a gentleman, lived down in Kent
But there my career took a bit of a dent.
I left town in a hurry, and amid some strife
I was found in the bed of my master's good wife.

But it's no, nay, never..

Was out on my own then just making ends meet
My only companions the scum of the street
We held up a stagecoach, 'twas for London bound -
Made off with some trinkets worth six thousand pound

But it's no, nay, never..

Spent months on the road then, avoiding the law
Then the Kaiser turned up for a bit of a war
We made some good sport with the rifle and gun
Till Peter went out to a ball from the Hun

So it's no, nay never... (go over the top!)
No nay never no more
Will I play the wild Bunter,
No never, no more